Me & My Designer Dress

‘Any opportunity to get into fashion and find a beautiful dress, I’m very definitely excited about that’ – Emilia Clarke

In the grand scheme of things, I spend very little money on clothes. If my husband reads this he will undoubtedly call me a steaming hotpot of lies, however what I mean by that is, I buy clothes often, I just don’t spend a lot of money on them. To illustrate, here’s a visual representation of the clothes I own:

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’m some kind of cheapskate who has to buy second hand clothes all the time, I just change my mind (and my waistline) quicker than Taylor Swift goes through boyfriends and I like to have choice. The idea of a capsule wardrobe quite frankly makes me have a panic attack.

Taking all that into consideration, a few weeks ago I found myself in town after a particularly difficult job interview where I’d received a bit of a grilling and I was feeling very sorry for myself. As I had the rest of the day off and a small amount of birthday money left I decided to do a bit of sales shopping. I found myself in TK Maxx, not somewhere I go all that often but I felt I’d exhausted the rails of Primark, H&M and my local Tesco recently so decided to have a browse, I was actually looking for a denim shirt.

In among all the denim shirts that I couldn’t afford, like a magpie I was drawn to a navy blue sequin dress. My god it was beautiful, I couldn’t resist but have a closer look. My heart nearly stopped beating when I saw it was Kate Spade (a designer my friend Carrie has won round to after giving me a Kate Spade purse she didn’t want any more) Then my heart definitely stopped beating when I saw it was my size (the only one of its kind in the whole shop I might add, and it was in my size!). And AND who doesn’t love a dress with pockets?!

I resuscitated myself again by looking at the price, yeah, there was no way I could afford that however for some reason it stayed in my hand all the way to the dressing room. I’d convinced myself that once I’d tried it on I would see how ill-fitting it was and skip on down the street to Primark where I belong. Of course it fit like a glove, in fact it fit like I was always meant to have it on. Crap.

Desperate times called for desperate measures. There was only one person who could be me the verbal smack around the mouth I needed and tell me to grow up and stop being so materialistic. My mum. This is the whatsapp exchange that followed:

Double crap. So you know what I did? I bought the bloody dress. And you know what else? I’m pleased I did because I never treat myself and I felt amazing when I put that dress on. I know it’s completely vain and completely senseless and I probably will only get a couple of wears out of it at best but I don’t care.  Because I love my new Kate Spade dress. Perhaps that interview shook something in me, perhaps I was having some kind of mental breakdown or perhaps I just fancied doing some reckless for a change.

I think sometimes it feels good to do something out of character to test yourself to see what you’re made of. The interview had pulled me out of my comfort zone so while I was flailing around in the ether of weakness I reckoned I may as well go big or go home.

So I went big. Then I went home. Giving my obligatory visit to Primark a miss on this occasion.