Every year me and Carrie have a sleepover at her house where we wear matching pyjamas, drink prosecco and talk about the year we’ve just had, whether we would consider it a success, and what our hopes and dreams are for the future.
Needless to say, that didn’t happen this year.
And if it had, I imagine the conversation would have gone something like this:
Me: so would you consider 2020 to have been a successful year?
Carrie: Nope, you?
Carrie: More prosecco?
So, to pinch a rejected line from this year’s Queen’s Speech. Where do we fucking start?!
This year has been monumentally shit and very much a rollercoaster of emotions almost on a daily basis. I laugh when I think about when this all started. I remember being in a hotel room in Eastbourne the first week in March and getting ready to leave with the news on in the background. They had a daft woman on defending her choice to panic buy toilet roll and pasta because the virus was coming and we were all doomed. I remember thinking what an over dramatic wally she was and how stupid she would look in 2 weeks time it had all blown over. Cut to 23rd March and Boris Johnson’s infamous words; you must stay at home. Who’s the wally now?
I’ll admit I was actually secretly (or perhaps not so secretly if you read my regular lockdown updates) quite enjoying summer lockdown life. The weather between May and July was amazing, we spent many a 2020 weekend sunbathing in the garden eating ham and cheese toasties and drinking margaritas. Thanks to lockdown, going out for our government sanctioned exercise meant running on empty roads, which was a joy. I felt like for the most part of last year and beginning of this year we really needed a circuit breaker on social engagements, saving money and just chilling out for a bit. Summer 2020 allowed us to actually do that guilt free.
Of course the downside of all of that is that it’s only novel for so long and this is the North East of England, summer was all but gone by August. No to mentioned of course the devastation that this virus has caused, people being furloughed, losing their jobs or businesses, losing family members etc etc. Believe me we are well aware of how lucky we are to be able to say we took the summer to reset and just make the best of a very bad situation.
Winter 2020 has been a slightly different affair and we’ve both been a little more up and down with the whole working from home sitch, dark nights, being unable to get outside in daylight, pubs and restaurants being shut, not being able to spend time with friends and family and generally just being sick of seeing the same four walls of our own house. This is it though, this is life for the next couple of months more now. We’ve both been told we’ll be working from home for at least another few months yet and even then it’s very likely we’ll be working home by default and only going into an office when absolutely necessary.
So what are my hopes and dreams for the future? Well aside from the obvious and being able to travel and be in the same room as my mum and dad again, I guess what I hope the most is the cheesy saying of in the rush to go back to normal, I hope we re-evaluate what parts of normal we’re in a rush to go back to. One of my posts over the summer was about whether I though lockdown has made me selfish in 2020, and I still think maybe it has, but for the better. Because I had a very bad habit of doing things I didn’t want to do to please other people. I really hope I do less of that in 2021. I want to push myself out of my comfort zone. I’ve been approached my one of my fave North East institutions to work with them on something really exciting in eraly January but it’s a massive leap for me and would have been an easy job to turn down if I was feeling shy.
I’m not sure about you but I was definitley guilty of being the kind of person who would say ‘oh we must get together and do XYZ soon’ and never really mean any of it, or at least, be pretty confident it was all just lip service. There are a few things though that, particularly me and some some of my southern besties have been meaning to arrange for a while now, like getting together so our other halves can finally meet. We all agreed that this period of enforced separation has now bumped those vague plans up to priorities.
And dancing. I really miss dancing.